to the pretty girls

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

oh, to be pretty
one girl sighs.
why am I not pretty?
one girl cries.
i am not pretty
one girl believes the lies
and takes her beautiful life
and dies.


This poem- it makes my heart hurt in such an odd way.  You know that feeling when you watch Will Turner say goodbye to Elizabeth on the beach, and you see his ship disappear on the horizon while the achingly bittersweet music fills the dark screen? 
That's how it feels, because even as your heart breaks for Elizabeth, there's still the light at the end of the tunnel.  You know that in 10 years he will come back to her. 
It's not too late.
I didn't realize it at the time, but I think that I wrote that poem with not three separate girls in mind, but one.
One girl, with three snap shots of her life captured at different stages of her life.  Stage one, she is craving a beauty she doesn't think she'll ever attain.  It dances tantalizingly close and yet is always out of reach.  Her idea of beauty comes in the form of magazine covers, comparing her form to other girl's, and Hollywood's warped ideas.  She is not desperate enough to do anything drastic to get it- yet.
A little farther down the way we see our girl again.  She is changed.  She's pale, tired, and angry.  Her standard of beauty is so high and impossible that she is close to giving up.  She demands to know why she isn't as pretty as she always wanted to be. 
Her heart-felt cry is echoed by millions of girls and women everywhere, who hide it behind locked bathroom doors and muffle it by pillows. 
A shockingly fast time later we meet our girl for the third, and last time.  Her longing and despair are evident as she finally decides that she is not pretty.  Nobody will miss her.  Nobody will care- at least, not for very long, so she raises the gun in her trembling hands. 
Oh, to be pretty. 
Remember what I said about it not being too late for Elizabeth?
Darling, it's not too late for you either.  (you don't even have to wait ten years)
I can't begin to attempt to understand you, or your terrible, painfully horrendously real-as-life struggles.  Nobody feels them as uniquely or deeply as you do.  Nobody, that is, but the person who suffered the most so he could empathize the most.  On that cross those two thousand years ago, every sin on Him was laid.  Every despicable, ugly feeling, thought, and action.  You think He doesn't understand what you're feeling as you throw up your dinner or cry yourself to sleep?
Sister, He more then feels it.

I wish all of this could magically transfer from head knowledge to heart knowledge, just like that.  How desperately I wish that for you and I. 
suddenly, we wouldn't just say 'I'm beautiful in God's eyes';  we would just live like it.
suddenly, we wouldn't doubt that he feels our pain; we would take comfort in that.
suddenly, it all wouldn't matter so much.
suddenly, there is hope.
Hope for you, and hope for me.
Hope that maybe, we don't have to be pretty..... maybe because we already are.

-all pictures courtesy of Pinterest-

Chloe Salts is an aspiring writer, pumpkin latte snob, and sweater-loving sophomore who is slowly learning, day by day, what it means to fall in love with her Savior.
Give her books and chocolate and she will bake cupcakes for you until Jesus comes to take her home.  True story.
Follow her on 
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  1. You are such a moving writer,Chloe! And for the record, you are lovely, inside AND out. ;) Yes that is a cliche, but we both know about those. ;) ;)

    1. You are such a darling friend, Hannah dear!! Thank you for your words and your time. And on clichés... those can sometimes be the nicest things in the world:)

  2. aww, this post moved my heart in a wonderful way <3

    1. I'm so glad! A writer loves nothing more then to hear those words! :)

  3. Beautifully written and very moving. Emma xx

    1. It was very convicting for me to write! I'm glad it moved you; mission accomplished!

  4. You are a very talented blogger! I love reading your posts!

    1. Gee, thank you! I hope you come and read again soon:)

  5. Great topic and very well written! Good job, Chloe!

    1. Thank you Jayden! It's such a great reminder for all of us. ;)

  6. Woooww. Seriously, your writing is so YOU! It's open and sweet and dreamy and CHLOE! It's a strange description, but it's true! Keep on YOUR writing, I love it!

  7. This was such a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing, Chloe.


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